November 10, 1979

Saturday; I"m 16.

I have devised a variation of the game of chess.  In this variation, you play the game on a sphere with 64 squares on it.  One side starts at one pole, the other at the opposite.  I won't use a latitude and longitude method for making squares, since the poles would be points and many squares (really, triangles) would meet there, unlike a regular board.

November 10, 1979

Saturday; I'm 16.

Most TV shows now are crap!

I've read that modern paper only lasts about 30 years.  The high sulfuric acid content eats it away.  Too bad.  I want this notebook to last a lot longer than that.  

At school BJ F. and I have formed an empire.  The Empire of Ticonderoga in the Eighth Dimension.  We are Co-Emperors.

November 9, 1979

Friday; I"m 16.

I went with Tim D. to Gastown where he works at a self-serve gas station, to see how hard his job is.  He's always telling me it's more than pressing the "authorize" button.  Actually, there is not a lot more to it.  Just handling cash and change, sweeping, giving directions, and a few other little things.  

Got A's and B's on my report card for the first nine weeks.

I've become quite interested in Leonardo da Vinci.  A most amazing person.  Such a mind!  He is the perfect union of art and science.  The more I read about him, the more amazed I am of him.

November 2, 1979

Friday; I"m 16.

[2008:  Here are drawn plans for an "organetta," a small organ powered by a foot pump attached to a balloon as a "wind chest."  I also had designs for the keys and how the action would uncover an air hole to the organ pipe to produce a sound.  I was really fascinated by pipe organs at this time.]

October 24, 1979

Wednesday; I"m 16.

I'm not sure when it started, but it's been going on for a few weeks now.  I first noticed it one night after I had gone to sleep.  A strange noise woke me up.  I looked up groggily from my pillow, fumbling around for the light switch.  Suddenly something blew into my face.  Confused, I tried to brush it away.  It kept fluttering around my head, like some strange moth.  I was swinging my arms crazily about, trying to get it off my face, when I fell out of bed.  The lights quickly snapped on, for some strange reason.  I was looking up at the time, and the bright light blinded me for a moment.  I was dazed, blinded, and confused.  That thing was lying on the floor.  I grabbed it, but I had to wait a few seconds until my eyes adjusted to the light.  When I finally could see, I saw that I was holding a leaf in my hand.  The thing fluttering around my face was a leaf.  Being half-asleep, I couldn't figure out how a leaf would fly around my head like an insect.  But in the middle of the night, I didn't care, so I went back to sleep.  

Later the next day I was walking home from school.  I sort of strolled along, kicking the bright autumn leaves lying on the ground.  As I walked, a low sort of growling sound became audible.  Suddenly the wind picked up fast, to my face.  A wall of wind-blown leaves engulfed me.  I covered my face with my arms, and as the leaves flew past me, a louder growl surrounded me.

October 21, 1979

Sunday; I"m 16.

I never practice the piano as much as I should.  I've been playing for two years, two months.  Right now I'm working on Mozart's third sonata and a Bach piece.  

"When in doubt, jump up and down."

I'm more interested in doodling than writing.

I'll think I'll make another move this week.  Some more pixelation.  Maybe I'll redo the chess game.

October 20, 1979

Saturday; I'm 16.

Do I fear old age or death?  Death, no, because I believe in life after death.  Old age?  I cannot imagine myself as a senior citizen.  I don't even know what I'll look like in 10 years.  And how long will I live?  Well, I plan to be at least 100 before I die, and there is no reason why I couldn't live that long.  In fact, it's the simple truth that I'm going to live at least 100 years, if not more.  

October 19, 1979

Friday; I'm 16.

Tomorrow Tim D. and I are going to make an 8mm film.  This will be my third.  I did the first by myself, the second with Craig R.  I'm not really sure what we are going to do.  I have an idea of filming it an interesting angle.  Tim and I also might do some Monty Python type stuff.  Perhaps a shot while bike riding.

Today at school we had a pep rally.  Being anti-bobcat (our school mascot) and anti-school spirit, I never get all hyped up at rallies.  They always remind me of the Nuremburg rallies of 1936 in Nazi Germany.  

I wonder if I'll always like classical music.  At the present time I hope so, but in the coming years, who knows?  Now it's conceivable that my particular likeness for barouqe music might change, but generally classical is the only music I listen to.  rock and roll is good music, and I like it, but when compared to Bach it always comes out a loser.

I'm different from other people.

 

October 13, 1979

Saturday; I"m 16.

[2008: the last mirror writing entry!  what a stupid idea!  will decode later.]

October 8, 1979

Monday; I'm 16.

[2008:  mirror writing entry; will decode later.]

September 29, 1979

Saturday; I'm 15.

[2008: entry in mirror writing; will translate later.  It does mention that tomorrow Tim D. and I will go see Monty Python's Life of Brian.]

September 26, 1979

Wednesday; I"m 15.

[2008: mirror writing again.  will decode later.]

September 25, 1979

Tuesday; I"m 15.

[2008: written in mirror writing, and in light pencil.  can't read it now.  will figure it out later.]

September 15, 1979

Saturday; I'm 15.

[2008: this entry is written in "mirror" handwriting, like da Vinci.  What a pain to read!]

How's this for writing?  From now on I'm going to write like this in here, for added secrecy.  I've decided to write my journal this way because lately I've been reading up on Leonardo da Vinci.  I've always been interested in him, but a few weeks ago I couldn't find any books on him at the university library.  The books on him are under his first name, Leonardo.  I always figured he'd be under Vinci.

Well, I've been at school for two weeks. I'm now used to the school schedule.   

September 3, 1979

Monday; I"m 15.

I think I'm going to be sick.  School starts tomorrow.  Actually, I like school, or to be precise, I like to learn, but the first day is always depressing.  Summer is over, and it's time to work.  Time to say good bye to free time.  Now a formal quest for knowledge take over my informal one.  By the way, I got my grades back from my logic and cosmology courses.  In both I got B's.  Was I relieved.  I wasn't so sure what I was going to get in cosmology, but I expected at least a B in logic.

Now I'm going to get another folder for my 10th grade works.  My ninth grade file is closed.

 

August 28, 1979

Tuesday; I"m 15.

So much for lengthy entries.  As for that long walk, Tim D. and I went through the Kenwood woods, into the unexplored woods, down the old train tracks to Gypsy Lane, road up Gypsy lane to Main street and back to Tim's house.

I don't think I told you about the Kenwood woods.  they lie behind the playground of Kenwood school.  It is privately owned, but it is not fenced off.  You walk right from the playground into the woods, usually on the main trail.  The main trail connects into all the other trails, of which there are many.  The main trail makes a big U in the woods.  The first branching trail on the right leads you to the pond, which is usually empty.  Here hoods come over and drink beer and smoke.  

In the woods' golden age, there were many forts built.  Most were built by six graders or younger, but some older kids built forts.  The most famous fort is the Hippie Hangout.  It was built of junk, as are all of the forts; part of its floor was once a door to a prison cell.  The walls were piled logs and it had no roof.  In fact, it only had 2 walls.  The hoods used it to smoke and drink, but as like every other fort it is in ruins now.  The ruins and remains of about 5 other forts, perhaps more if you looked hard, can still be seen.  

One is Don M.'s old fort, which Tim D. and myself destroyed at a time when we didn't like Don.  Another fort, and the most recent built, was first started by Tim D.  and I, but we forgot about it, so my brother Colman, Gary M., and Bill and Danny T., all being hoods, used it as a hood hideout.  It was the best built fort in the woods, but that's because they used tools (stolen).  I must say that most forts were conglomerations of junk, without roofs, sometimes using trees and brush.  But this fort had four walls and a ceiling.  It even had a crude screen window and a wood floor.  After Colman, Gary, and Billy and Danny stopped using it some other hoods moved in.  Knowing this, and being anti-hood, Tim D. and I proceeded to destroy the fort.  

When the hoods came back, they wrote a threat on the wreckage: "your dead!"  Of course Tim and I had a wonderful laugh when we read it.  The fort has not been rebuilt since.  Other ruins are scattered about the woods like piles of junk.  The main building material for forts was sheets of metal and plywood.

Back then, the woods had well-defined trails and was much traveled.  But this golden age ended about 5 years ago.  I was in it in maybe third, and fourth and fifth grades, but it started before I got there.  Don and Tim had built forts before I was there.  For some reason, though, after my classmates and I got out of the sixth grade, except for the occasional  hood, nobody went in the woods much.  Now the trails, even the main trail, are overgrown.  The woods are unused.

 

Augusts 27, 1979

Sunday; I'm 15.

I'm listening to Bach's Third Brandenberg Concerto while I'm writing this.  Best piece of music by anyone.  I could listen to it for hours.  Every time I listen to it, it gives me a nice feeling, though it's rather hard to describe.  Puts me in a sort of reflective type of mood.  But enough of that.  At 11:30 tonight on PBS, Monty Python and the Holy Grail is going to be on.  Now that is a funny movie.  MP Flying Circus is about the only thing good enough to watch on tv.

Now I'm waiting for I, Claudius to come on.  That's worth watching.

I've just thought of an interesting short story.  A boy is listening to a record with headphones when he hears a voice in the headphone.  He talks to the voice, but only through the headphones.  Weird things happen and so on.

There are many thing I wish to talk to you about.  For one, who is this 'you' that I refer to.  I agree it is whomever is reading this.  Although as far as I know, I"m the only one who is ever going to read this.  Of course since I plan to save this indefinitely, perhaps many years after I'm dead and gone someone will pick this up in a dusty old attic.  But that will not be for a long time, particularly since I plan to live a very long time.  At the minimum, I'll hit a hundred.  Well, whoever is reading this, don't throw it away!  Give it to someone in my family, if I have one.

I"m going to love reading this in the future.  And I'll have plenty to read, since I plan to keep a a journal for the rest of my life if I can.  There are so many things to talk about.  How about the future.  Tim D. and I, both top notch astrophysicists.  Don M., the leading pianist in the country.  But what would happen if I had never met Tim or Don?  My life would certainly be altered.  Who could I confide with?  Tim N.?  Certainly not.  I might have lapsed into conformity.  As for Don, though I often joke about him, and despite his many annoying characteristics, I did miss him when he went on vacation.  he's the type that at first you can't tolerate, but after a while he sort of grows on you.  And besides, a trio is better than a pair.

No matter how well I know him, I wonder about Tim D.

August 24, 1979

Friday; I'm 15.

"All that a man needs in life is a dead dog and a pickup truck."

I bought another harmonica today.  Hohner's marine band.  Wow, big deal!  

School is starting on Sept. 4 this year; not much longer.  It seems that I'm going to have Tim N. in a number of my classes.  Gym, German II, and English.  Oh well, he's not that bad.

I've been trying to decide that if I become a writer, and if I used a pseudonym, what would it be?  I've got the last name: Dresden.  but I can't decide on the first: John, Thomas, Robert, Felix, Frank, Johnathan, Oscar, etc. 

August 23, 1979

Thursday; I'm 15.

Boy, do I want a roll top desk.  I've always like the one my dad has very much, but now Tim D. has one.  Actually he's had it for a number of months.  But I just can't stand my present desk.  It's small and can't be flush with the wall because of those stupid wood edgeboards on the bottom of the wall.  And besides, I love pigeonholes.  You can cram all sorts of junk and knick knacks in them.  And it burns me up that my dad has one, and so does my  best friend.

But I have a plan.  I fiendishly clever plan.  A diabolical plan.  I will kill Tim, yes, that's it.  I will kill him.  He will die, and I will take his desk.  I deserve it anyway.  I will kill Tim. hee hee hee hee hee!! I will murder him, and he will die!  And the desk will be all mine!  All Mine!  And no one will ever suspect me.  I"m too clever for them.  I am much more clever than those inferior humans.  I will kill him in such a way that no one will suspect.  DIE, TIM, DIE!!!!

Note:  This last topic (killing Tim D.) is merely my exercise of my creative abilities.  I have no intention of murdering Tim.  Don't take it seriously.

Well, not a lot has been happening around here.  Don came back from his California vacation.  I got my schedule for the high school.  Beginning September 4, I'll be a tenth grader, a sophomore.  I'm going to like the HS better than the junior high.  The HS is a much more modern building.  But I can't wait for college.  Then I can study what I really want to, astrophysics.

August 16, 1979

thursday/I'm 15.

Hello.  Guess what, last night I went on my first date.  And with who else, but Cathy Hamilton.  We went to the movies and saw "Escape from Alcatraz"  with Clint Eastwood.  It was a good movie.  We went to the 7:20 showing.  I had a nice time.  We couldn't go anywhere afterwards, because she had to pack to go to her aunt's house that night.  We rode our bikes there and back.  I didn't hold her hand, nor did I kiss her good night.  However, one thing leads to another, and perhaps the next time I go out with her, we can get a little closer.

Lately I've been doing a little composing in my spare time.  It's fun, and not as hard as I thought.  

There are a lot of topics I'd like to talk to you about, like philosophy, dreams, cosmology, life, etc.  I hope I can get up enough willpower to sit down and write it all.

 

August 9, 1979

Thursday, I’m 15.

Boy, what a day. Two events to talk about. First, I actually got up the courage to call up Cathy bymyself, without anybody’s help. Of course, she wasn’thome. She’s probably on vacation. Now I’ll have togo to the fair with either Tim D. or Don.

Next event. I just came back from a rather harrowingevent. At about 9:30 pm, Tim N. came over to show methe lawns I’m going to mow. He showed me both, and wewent into his house, so he could show me some M-80firecrackers he’d gotten. Well, I saw them, and wedecided to light one. So we went downstairs andoutside into his driveway. We started with a fewsmall fireworks, like those charcoal snakes. We lit ablackcat, which didn’t go off, and then the M-80. Now, the M-80s are very formidable firecrackers. Much more powerful than blackcats, and surpassed only bythe rare M-100. When the M-80 went off, there wasthis big BOOM and a bright flash. Then we crept up tothe blackened concrete where it exploded. Then we sawthis man across the street looking at us through hisdoor. We froze. He just kept looking at us. Finallyhe went inside and Tim started locking all the doorsand flipping all the lights out as fast as possible.

I wondered why he did this, and then he looked outthe window and there was a police car in his driveway. So Tim, being paranoid, rushed upstairs into hisroom. Or so I thought. I went into his room, anddidn’t see anybody. I then heard a voice say “Robert,go to sleep.” This sort of surprised me, so I justwent into his room and sat for about ten minutes. Igot tired of sitting, so I came out into the hallway,and tried to find Tim.

I stumbled down the pitch black hallway, calling until he came out.  I told him I had to go, but we looked out and saw a police car going around the block.  So we went into different rooms, peeking out of windows, and trying to figure out what to do.  So I waited until about 10:20 and decided I should try to leave.  So we crept down the stairs, and out to the back door.  

"Are you ready?" Tim N. asked.

"Yes," I replied.

So he opened the door and I crouched over and made my way to my bike.  I knelt down, quietly put up my kickstand, rolled down the driveway, and rode off.  Luckily, no one saw, like I figured.  I got home safely, and told my parents what happened.  They thought it was funny, and it was.  Tim N. acted so scared and paranoid.  I was much calmer.

August 7, 1979

Tuesday/I"m 15.

Your wish of luck didn't help.  I stayed home all day, since Tim was with Katie and Don wasn't here.  I thought I could convince myself to call Cathy.  But, as always, I talked myself out of it.  Dumb stupid idiot me!  My whole outlook to this is terribly illogical.  It is perfectly natural to be attracted to the opposite sex, and logically, if there is someone you like, you want to be with them.  And in our society it is up to the males to make the first move.  So it is highly improbable that Cathy will call me up.  So, if I like her, I should logically make some effort to be with her, such as calling and asking her out.  But I haven't done that.  Actually, I did on June 1, but ever since then I haven't been able to do it again.  Not that I haven't tried.  But every time Tim tries to help me, and I do call, the phone is busy.  And every time I could call when I'm at home, I talk myself out of it.  I think tomorrow I'll go to Tim's, to see if he can get me to call her.

August 6, 1979

Monday; I'm 15.

You're not going to believe what happened today.  A momentous event that will go down in History.  Tim D., 17 years old, has finally asked out a girl!!  Can you believe it?  The spell has begun to break.  There is still hope for Tim.  Of course it wasn't easy to get Tim to do it.  I went to his house today, because I had rather unwillingly been made to call Cathy H.  

It seems that a few days ago Tim and his sister Mary had gone to Howards for a few drinks.  He got a little tipsy and told Mary about Cathy H., and Dawn S.  So when Mary found out (I didn't exactly appreciate Tim for telling) she told Tim that she'll help both of us to call, and ask out Cathy for me, and Katie D. for Tim.  The next day when Tim told me about this, of course I was against it.  I do want to go out with Cathy, but my chickenness stops me.  So he threatened to call Cathy himself and tell her everything I told Tim about her.  So, even though I figured he was bluffing, I deep down did want to go see Cathy, so I agreed.  

Well, today, you should have seen the fighting going on.  Tim had volunteered to be worked on first, so we dragged, pulled, kicked, pushed and shoved him to the phone.  Eventually he called a few times, but without success.  Then it was my turn.  Well, I ran off rather quickly, but Tim caught me and dragged pulled, kicked, and shoved me to the phone.  But every time Mary dialed, I pushed a few buttons to mess it up.  I even took the phone off the mounting, but to no avail.  I as finally forced to sit away from the phone while Mary dialed Cathy's number.  but, good look intervened and nobody answered, so I was off the hook.  

Again, we started on Tim after me.  Well, he shot like a rocket right out of the house, but he returned, and so we got him to sit down while we dialed.  Lo and behold, someone answered.  Then Katie got on the line.  so they chit-chatted for a few minutes, and finally Tim asked her if she would like to go to the county fair (Aug. 6-11) and she accepted.  Well of course Tim was ecstatic, but we all took it calmly.  So tomorrow I'm, I hope, going to call Cathy and ask her out to the fair.  Wish me luck.

 

August 1, 1979

Wednesday; I"m 15.

Hi!  As I'm writing this I'm listening on the headphones to Glenn Gould playing Bach's Well Tempered Clavier, book 2.  Nice record.  

Well, I have some news.  Tim D. has finally gotten a chance to get a girlfriend.  Her name is Katie.  Tim met her on July 28, when Tim's sister Kathy got married.  I was invited.  It was a nice wedding.

Well, to get on, at the reception Tim met this girl named Katie, who is a relative of the groom.  they got to talking, and since I was right by them studying two spiders, I heard some of their conversation (Tim also told me about it later).  Katie was talking to Tim about how she had taken all these different drugs.  But she said she took them only once to see what they were like.  And even if she liked them she said she would still only take them once.  Tim of course doesn't like drugs, and won't take them, and he told her this.  She respected his opinion.  She doesn't force her opinions and beliefs on others.  Then Don M. signaled me to get out of the garage so they could be alone (now I'm listening to Handel's Royal Fireworks music).  So Don and I went out to play ping-pong in his yard, while Tim and Katie wandered off.  Later I found out by Tim that they both had gone over to a house where Kathy was.  She and a bunch of her friends were smoking a bowl.  Katie took a puff, offered Tim some, but he declined.  They stayed a little while, and then came back.  When he came back, I saw him and asked him where he went.  Tim told me about it, and then we saw Don come up from his house.  Before, Don thought when Tim had disappeared that he had taken Katie up to the fort at the top of the garage to make out.  So Tim and I decided to tell Don just that.  Well, Don fell for it and we had our fun until Tim finally decided to tell Don.  He then said that he didn't believe Tim anyway from the start, but he did.  When he asked Tim "let me shake your hand!" he believed him.  I'll talk more on the morrow.

July 30, 1979

Monday; I'm 15.

Today I got a letter from Lisa G. in Iowa.  She's doing fine, staying up until 11:30 and getting up at noon.  Can you believe that?  that's 12.5 hours of sleep a day!  She's conscious only half the day.  Gad, what a waste of time.  I think tomorrow I'll write her back.

We got a new car today.  A 1979 Chrysler LeBaron.  Only 8,000 miles on it.  It was used as a demonstrator.  It's light gray on the outside with a gray interior.  And leather seats!  It is definitely a nice car.  it has a very quiet ride.  Smooth, too.

My logic and cosmology classes at BGSU are going pretty good.

I wish I would start writing down more of my dreams.  I've to a 15 year backlog, though.  One thing I could do is every time I write a recent dream down, I'll write an old one down.  But, my dreams take so long to write down.

I've been jogging again, for about 2 weeks.  With Tim D.  We are going 3 miles a day, in about 25 minutes.

July 25, 1979

Wednesday.  I'm 15.

Well, it seems I never got around to writing that next morning.  But, I'm here now.

I've had a few interesting dreams lately.  A couple of nights ago I dreamed that I was living in our old house on south main.  Tim D. and I were going to walk somewhere, when we saw from my porch about 10 black hoods across the street, all wearing tan jumpsuits.  Since we had to cross the street, I suggested that maybe we should take a different route, considering that the hoods were all carrying big quarterstaffs, and were acting rowdy.  Tim said we needn't worry, so I consented.  As we were about to cross the street, though, another gang appeared on the side of the street.  There were about 6 of them, were all white, and all wore black leather jackets.  When Tim saw this, he changed his mind and agreed with me that perhaps we ought to quietly leave.  It happened that the gang on our side of the street wanted to rumble with the other gangs.  So we hastened to get out.  Surprisingly enough, we crossed the street to get out, which took us right to the fight.  But we crossed the street safely and ran down a street connecting to Main (which was strangely small and trafficless).  As we rushed down the street I looked back and saw the white gang riding unicycles in a circle around the black gang.  We kept running until we got to the end of the bl0ck, which on the right side was a huge 10 foot hedge.  It was straight up and pointed at the top.  So to get away, we climbed up and over it.  For some reason it was dense enough that we could climb it with ease, it didn't crush under us.  So when we got on the other side, we sat down, rested, and the dream ended.

 

July 20, 1979

Friday.  I'm 15.

Howdy.  Nothing much happened today.  A friend of my parents is staying over night.  She's getting a divorce, so she needs a place to stay.  I think I'll write some tomorrow morning.  Bye.

July 16, 1979

Monday.  I'm 15.

Well, I finally did it.  I went, after all these years, to Cedar Point.  And it was fun.  There were multitudes of rides to choose from, including five roller coasters.  The coasters are the most fun.  The best one there is the Gemini.  the first plunge is at a 55 degree angle.  And when you go on it at night, boy is it fun!  The other four are fun, too, although the Corkscrew is a little too rough.  What with all those loops, you get knocked around a bit.  Of course another feature at Cedar Point are the girls!  What little some of them wear in the summer!  You can get glimpses of all sorts of things.  

mom and Joe, 70s

mom and Joe, late 70s

July 13, 1979

Friday; I'm 15.

I went to Lisa G.'s going  away party tonight.  Tim N., BJ F., Gretchen S., myself and of course Lisa G were there.  So was some girl named Kathy.  I had a fun time.  Unfortunately, Kathy H. didn't make it.  But still it was fun.  I brought my tarot cards with me, and I ended up giving a ton of readings.  Lisa G. asked my about her imminent air flight, her future sex life, her present sex life, what's going to happen to her in the next 10 years.  BJ asked me about his future sex life, how rich he will be, will he be married, and if so, will it be happy.  Gretchen asked me about her future sex life and how rich she is going to be.  Tim N. asked me about how successful his job is going to be.  Cathy asked me about her life in nine years.  I gave readings most of the night.

Too bad Lisa's moving.  I'm going to miss her.  I like her better than Cathy H.  But, I was too chicken ever to do anything.  Of course, she does live about 4 miles out of town.  But that shouldn't stop me.

[2008: I must have learned to read tarot cards somewhere around 76 or 77.  Jenny introduced them to me, I think. ]